Dear Blog, My mother has 37 cats. Her house stinks and is filthy. Now she wants to babysit my 9-month-old for the weekend. What should I do?

Answer: Calm down. Everything will be fine. You cannot deny your mother access to her grandchild. Here's what you do: Dress the baby up in a dog costume. Cats are stupid and they'll stay away. As for the smell, let's be honest. Between the spit up, creamed spinach and the poopie diapers, what could smell worse than a baby?