Dear Blog, now that Angelina is pregs with Brad's baby, do you feel sorry for Jennifer?

Answer: Blell no! Jennifer's star hasn't shone so bright since that pug-nosed two-timer took off to shack up with that skanky Angelina. Aniston's on every magazine cover on the planet and has been for a year. She's got the world feeling sorry for her and that translates into ticket sales for her movies in which, let's face it, every character she plays bears a striking resemblance to Rachel. She's a cutey, make no mistake, but she's a one trick cutey. Advice for Jennifer: Get a good accountant and ride this money train for as long as you can. Cuz when those looks fade, well, you'll be standing in the audition lines next to the likes of Ginger, Wonder Woman, and every other faded TV star... Sacre bleu!